Beauty and the Earl Read online

  Morning had broken after a long and sleepless night, but Liam could not celebrate its beauty, despite staring out at a perfect day from the breakfast room window. The fact that the weather was magnificent and the birds were chirping actually felt like an affront. Why could it not rain when he was torn into pieces?

  The door behind him opened and when it slammed shut behind him, he knew who had entered without even turning.

  “Malcolm,” he said, and he did turn to look at his disheveled, red-faced friend.

  While Liam had withdrawn into himself and brooded over Violet, only expressing his anger and upset in the privacy of his now-slightly destroyed chamber, Mal had taken a different tact.

  His friend had stormed, he had slammed, he had bitten the head off of nearly every servant in Liam’s employ. Now Liam wasn’t surprised to see the same dark and dangerous expression on Mal’s face that had been there for almost twenty-four terrible hours.

  “She left,” his friend snapped as he slammed a plate onto the sideboard and shoveled food onto the dish without even looking at it.

  “She?” Liam said without clarifying what his friend meant. There was only one she now. “Not they?”

  Mal snorted and Liam shook his head. Perhaps his friend didn’t mean what Liam thought he did.

  “Which she?” he asked, his heart throbbing.

  Mal slowed his violent dishing and glanced up at him. “Violet. Gone early this morning back to London. Olivia remains in the home that was let by Rothcastle.”

  Liam turned toward the window again as emotions he did not want seemed to bombard him mercilessly. Violet’s departure only solidified what he already knew—everything they’d shared had been a lie. Despite all appearances to the contrary, she had never given a damn about him.

  That her betrayal was deep and dark.

  And yet, he still cared for her. Stupidly, foolishly and desperately.

  “Why do you track their movements?” he asked. “I don’t want to know.”

  Which was a lie, but he said it regardless.

  “I want to fucking know,” Mal said.

  Liam turned as his friend sat down at the table and shoved his plate as far from him as he could. Mal sprawled back in a dining chair, and for the first time Liam saw how rough his friend looked. His eyes were rimmed with red from lack of sleep and his face was drawn and desperate.

  His expression was in every way a reflection of how Liam felt.

  “Why?” Liam asked.

  Mal looked at him and beyond the anger, Liam saw something else. Pain. Heartbroken, razor-sharp pain, the kind that destroyed a man.

  He knew it well.

  “I told you I loved Olivia a few days ago,” Mal said. “In the heat of an angry moment.”

  Liam raised his brows. He had never considered his friend’s confession that day to be anything but truth and had been so wrapped up in himself that he hadn’t realized Mal was struggling with his feelings.

  “Was that a lie?” he asked softly.

  “It was never a lie. It was just utterly stupid. I do love her.”

  The words were rather shocking considering all the two men knew now about their lovers’ deception, but somehow Liam wasn’t shocked. Over the time they had been together, there was no denying how swiftly and powerfully Malcolm and Olivia had come together. He had seen their bond grow, he had seen his friend happier than he had ever been.

  “And how is that utterly stupid?” Liam asked.

  Mal shook his head. “Come, Liam, she was as part of this deception as Violet was. She came here to keep me from developing suspicions about her friend. I was just a pawn in their game.”

  Liam stared at him. He felt the same way about what Violet had done, but somehow he could forgive Olivia.

  “Let me ask you a question,” he said.

  Mal shrugged and fiddled with a loose string on the tablecloth without answering.

  “Would you lie for me?”

  Mal jerked his gaze up. “What?”

  “If I asked you to lie, would you?”

  His friend swallowed hard. “Yes.”

  “In fact, you have lied for me in the past, haven’t you?”

  “Yes, but that is different.”

  Liam sighed. “Probably not to those you lied to.” He shook his head. “If Violet ever told me the truth, and I think there were times when she did, then the bond she and Olivia share is powerful, very powerful.”

  “And so that means I should forgive?” Mal asked, but Liam could see his friend was thinking about what he said even if he tried to fight it.

  “What you do is up to you,” Liam said. “But the fact that Olivia didn’t go back to London with Violet says a great deal to me about where she stands.”

  Mal bit out a bitter laugh. “Perhaps she thinks she can get something from me.”

  Liam shook his head. “Weren’t you the one who told me if I wanted to die miserable and alone, that was my prerogative, but that you didn’t approve? Seems you might wish to follow your own advice.”

  Mal rolled his eyes. “Says the man who has been in hiding for years.”

  “Well, do as I say not as I do.” Liam smiled even though he felt no joy in this conversation. “At least go talk to the girl, Mal. At least let her explain. Unlike Violet, she didn’t orchestrate this mess. And she stayed. As I said, that has to mean something.”

  “I’ll consider it.” Mal shrugged as if it didn’t matter, but there was something in his eyes that told Liam he had hit his mark.

  Liam knew what that meant. Mal would do it. Mal would do it, and he and Olivia would probably work it out. Which made him happy for his friend.

  But it left him more alone than ever.

  “What will you do?” Mal asked. “Leave?”

  “You mean run?” Liam said.

  Mal didn’t respond to the question, but said, “Your sister might come.”

  Liam folded his arms. He had been so wrapped up in Violet’s part of this betrayal that he had hardly thought of Ava. How desperate she must have been to set this wicked plan into motion. Or was it her husband who had arranged it, laughing all the while?

  “My sister went to all this trouble,” he said. “Perhaps it’s time to settle what is between us once and for all. So let her come.”

  Chapter Seventeen

  Violet pushed the curtain away from the window as the carriage wound its way through London’s streets. Home again. Except this place wasn’t home. At least, after her appointment it wouldn’t be.

  The vehicle turned down the drive toward the Rothcastles’ beautiful estate. Unlike the first time she came here, Violet wasn’t impressed by its beauty or fascinated by its inhabitants.

  She was, however, nervous about the meeting she was about to take. She had no idea how the duke and duchess would receive her.

  The driver helped her from the carriage and she moved to the door. Once again, the Rothcastles’ servant greeted her, but this time there was no chilliness to his demeanor. The man actually smiled as he said, “Good afternoon, Miss Milford. We have been expecting you. Allow me to take your wrap and your gloves and then you may follow me to the parlor.”

  She blinked, uncertain why the previously stern butler was now so warm toward her. But she handed over the items he requested nonetheless and followed him to the same parlor where she had met with Lord and Lady Rothcastle what seemed like a lifetime ago. She flinched as she entered, recalling every moment of the arrangement she had made.

  The arrangement that had changed her life in ways she never could have imagined.

  “Help yourself to tea and biscuits if you’d like,” the butler urged. “Her Grace will be along shortly.”

  Violet nodded as the man left the room and pulled the door shut behind him. As soon as she was alone, she braced herself on the back of a nearby chair. Suddenly being here felt so very wrong. It only highlighted the pain she felt. It made her keenly aware of the loss of Liam, as well as the love she still carried in her heart.
/>   A love he had never known, wouldn’t believe and likely wouldn’t even want if she confessed it.

  “God,” she whispered, covering her eyes. “What have I done?”

  The door behind her opened, and Violet spun to face Lady Rothcastle with what she hoped was a blank expression. One she could not maintain when she saw the duchess.

  The last time the two women had met, Lady Rothcastle had been all cold reserve and hesitation. Now the lady had a broad smile on her face that made her even more beautiful than she had been. She rushed forward.

  “Oh, Miss Milford,” the duchess gushed. “How happy I am to see you.”

  The duchess stopped before her and for a moment Violet thought the lady might actually embrace her, as wild and inappropriate of a thought as that was. Of course, she didn’t, and the duchess’s cheeks darkened pink as she motioned to the settee instead.

  “I’m afraid my husband won’t be able to join us this afternoon. But please, won’t you sit with me and share tea?”

  Violet shifted with discomfort. She had hoped to come here, make the briefest report she could manage and flee. But now that did not seem possible.

  “Of course,” she said, taking the place Lady Rothcastle had indicated beside her.

  As the other woman poured tea and pointed toward cream and sugar, flavoring Violet’s tea as she liked it, Violet sat in discomforted quiet. What in the world could she say when all she could do was look at this woman and see hints of Liam in certain ways she moved? Being with her was like a heated blade shoved into her heart again and again.

  Torture that would not end.

  “Miss Milford,” Lady Rothcastle said once Violet had set her tea aside without tasting it. “Violet. May I call you Violet?”

  Violet drew back. It was a highly unusual request, but then a lady of the duchess’s rank rarely shared a room with a woman of her type, let alone tea.

  “Of—of course, Your Grace.”

  “Ava,” Lady Rothcastle corrected as she met Violet’s gaze and held there.

  “Oh, I couldn’t,” Violet said with a shake of her head. Even she would not be so bold.

  But Ava didn’t blink or withdraw. “I’m afraid I insist.” Without allowing Violet to argue further, Ava continued, “Violet, I cannot tell you how much your letters over the past weeks have meant to me. After so much time knowing nothing about my brother and his life…then to receive so much information, written with such detail and care…that meant everything to me.”

  Violet felt a shocking urge to break down into tears, but somehow managed to maintain her composure. Ava had no idea what her praise did. How it reminded Violet of her betrayal of a man she loved. And what she had sacrificed to bring Ava that information she coveted.

  “Thank you,” Violet choked out. “I am so pleased the information was helpful to you.”

  Ava took Violet’s hands unexpectedly and squeezed them. “When we first met, I realize I was uncertain, perhaps even cold toward you, but you must understand how painful this estrangement from my brother has been for me.”

  Violet drew in a shaky breath and managed to extract her fingers from Ava’s.

  “I can understand that perfectly,” she whispered. After all, she would suffer an estrangement from Liam now too. Permanent and unalterable.

  The pain she had been trying to pretend away since the previous morning now hit her in waves, threatening to overtake her and make her an even bigger fool than she already was. She could hardly sit still as her mind turned, again and again, to Liam.

  “My lady,” she whispered. “Ava, I appreciate your warmth, probably more than you know, but I would like to conclude our business. The past few days have been trying and I must return home to make some arrangements, as I intend to leave London as soon as I am able. There is much to be attended to and planned before I can do so.”

  Ava drew back a little, and for a moment Violet feared she had offended the duchess. But as she looked closer, she could see that wasn’t the case. Instead, the woman was watching her closely, reading her. Sizing her up.

  “Of course,” Ava finally said softly, without revealing any conclusions she had come to in her analysis. “Your missive, which arrived early this morning, alluded to developments in the situation with my brother. Your swift arrival now, which I assume means you hardly stopped along the road to London, makes me believe something dire has happened. Perhaps you would like to share that information with me?”

  Violet nodded. She had been practicing how she would reveal her final hours with Liam during the carriage ride from Bath. It was important not to reveal her heart to this woman above all others.

  “Do you know your brother’s man, Malcolm Graham?”

  Ava nodded. “Yes. He has been a loyal friend to my brother since Matilda’s death. Perhaps the only one he has remaining.”

  Violet nodded slowly. “He is a good man. But he is also a smart one and driven to protect Liam—Lord Windbury’s interests in every way. I tried to introduce certain distractions during my stay, but eventually Malcolm uncovered the connection between my arrival in Bath…and you.”

  Ava’s face paled two shades and her fingers dug into the settee arm at that revelation. “I see.”

  Violet swallowed, ignoring her memories of that horrible moment by sheer act of will. She forced herself to continue, “Yes. Of course Malcolm reported it all to your brother.”

  Ava shook her head slowly. “Great God. Liam must have been furious.”

  Violet blinked wildly as the sting of tears made it difficult to see. There was Liam’s face again, staring at her with that horrible look of betrayal and disgust. She would never forget it as long as she drew breath.

  “Yes, he was very angry,” she whispered. “He put me out of his home immediately, which is why I returned to London as soon as I could.”

  Ava didn’t respond for a moment, but looked closely at Violet. She felt the duchess’s gaze burning into her, peeling away her layers of protection.

  Finally Ava said, “If I know my brother at all, it must have been quite a scene.”

  Violet couldn’t bear to speak, but merely nodded.

  “You were with him for some time,” Ava said, leaning closer. “What were your thoughts, your impressions beyond anything you already wrote to me?”

  Violet pushed to her feet and walked away from the duchess toward the bright fire across the room. It was rude to do so, but she needed the space to gather her thoughts, to determine what secrets were safe to tell, both for herself and also so her betrayal of Liam wouldn’t become even worse than it already was.

  “I don’t think it’s a surprise to you that your brother is troubled,” she whispered. “At least, that is the impression he first gives when one meets him. But the more time I spent with him, the more I saw of his true character.”

  She faced Ava to find the lady perched on the edge of the settee, hands clasped.

  “He is getting better, Your Grace,” Violet admitted. “I have seen the depth of his kindness toward others. He laughs, though not excessively. But he doubts others and puts up walls.”

  Ava’s shoulders rolled forward. “Something I’m certain will not be helped by discovering your connection to me.”

  Violet flinched. “I’m certain he will lift those walls even higher when it comes to anyone who comes into his life and asks him to be more than the shell he presents to the world.”

  “Is that what you did?” Ava asked and again her gaze was appraising.

  Violet ignored her question. “I must tell you that he had…he once had very troubling thoughts after Matilda’s death.”

  Ava’s eyes went wide and her face paled. “Suicide?” she whispered.

  Violet couldn’t speak as her heart ached for Liam. She nodded slowly.

  Ava covered her mouth with a gasp. “I knew it was probably true, but to hear it.” She shook her head. “But now?”

  Violet swallowed. Liam’s words echoed in her head, telling her that he had put all t
hose thoughts aside…because of her. It was the most powerful thing he had ever said to her, that she had given him back thoughts of a future. It gave her a value no other man had ever placed on her.

  Her reward to him for that value had been bitter, indeed.

  “Violet?” Ava whispered. “Please tell me my brother does not still plan to harm himself.”

  “He told me he wouldn’t.” Violet turned away again.

  Ava’s breathing was rough. “Do you believe him?”

  “I don’t know. I hope so. He is different now than he was even when I first met him.” Violet stared out the window with unseeing eyes.

  She heard Ava stand and looked at her. The duchess was pale and her eyes were bright with tears.

  “I’m going to tell you something, Violet. Something only a handful of people know.”

  Violet drew back a step. Once again, she was struck by how odd this situation was. A duchess and a mistress, sharing tea and apparently secrets.

  “I’m having a child.” Ava’s hand came down to cradle her stomach, and as her dress went taut, Violet could see the hint of roundness that Ava’s fashionably high-waisted gown hid.

  “Congratulations,” Violet stammered. “When will your child be born?”

  “They believe in four to five months,” Ava said. She smiled, but the worry hadn’t left her eyes. “But you must see now why I went to such lengths to gain information about my brother. I need him in my life, Violet. Now more than ever. But I have no idea how to bring him home.”

  Violet blinked as Ava tilted her head in what appeared to be expectation.

  “Are you asking me to tell you?”

  “It seems you developed something very special with my brother,” Ava said. “You are the closest thing to an advisor from his inner circle that I have.”

  Violet leaned back against the window, letting the cool glass permeate and sooth her overheated body. “I am not in your brother’s inner circle. I’m certain he must despise me, and as you know, he does not forgive easily, nor does he have the incentive to do so with me that he has with you.”

  “So you will not tell me anything?” Ava asked, her voice cracking.