Forbidden Read online

  Forbidden

  (THE WICKED WOODLEYS BOOK 1)

  By

  USA Today Bestseller

  Jess Michaels

  FORBIDDEN

  The Wicked Woodleys Book 1

  Copyright © Jesse Petersen, 2015

  All rights reserved. This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the publisher except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

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  www.AuthorJessMichaels.com

  PO Box 814, Cortaro, AZ 85652-0814

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  DEDICATION

  A very special thank you for everyone who has supported me in the past year of my indie adventure.

  To the readers who have bought and shared, to my AMAZING street team who always rally to my aid, to my editor Mackenzie who catches all the things, to my Mom who is my cheerleader and copyeditor and especially to Michael, my husband, my best friend and my assistant extraordinaire. You all mean the world to me.

  CHAPTER ONE

  1816

  Lady Audrey perched on the edge of the loft above the stable, dangling her stockinged feet through the opening. She let out a sigh as she picked up the plate beside her abandoned slippers and took a small bite of her brother’s wedding cake. It should have been a very happy day for her.

  And it was. She was glad for Edward, her eldest brother, who had been estranged from the family for three long years and was now coming back into the fold. She gave credit for that fact in great measure to his new bride, Mary. Audrey already knew they would be friends. Good friends, most likely.

  But family gatherings always made her melancholy.

  Audrey sighed as she took another bite of cake and stared out at the bright afternoon sky through the window across from her.

  Below, there was sound of the stable door sliding open, and Audrey tensed as she looked down to see who had been sent to fetch her. Her tension fled when the person stepped into her view below her place in the loft.

  It was Jude Samson rather than any of her three brothers or her mother. Jude, the longtime man of affairs for Edward. A man so much like family that all her brothers saw him as such.

  And none of them ever noticed that Audrey couldn’t stop…watching him. Even Jude was oblivious. He glanced up at her from below.

  “Thought I’d find you here,” he said, that rough voice swirling up between them and settling somewhere in her lower stomach.

  “You know me so well.”

  She smiled down at him and he walked over to the ladder that led to the loft. He climbed up behind her. She forced herself not to look in his direction, but she felt him growing near regardless. When he pushed her discarded slippers aside and took a seat next to her, swinging his own booted feet through the hole to dangle next to hers, it was no surprise. She had guessed almost the exact moment he would do so.

  She stared at their legs next to each other. It seemed very intimate, her stockinged foot next to his booted one.

  “Did you notice I was gone or did Edward or Mama send you?” Audrey asked, making herself look at his face instead of his boots. Some day she was going to do something to make him see what she felt inside. But not today.

  He smiled and his rather stern expression softened to a more gentle and youthful one. Hardly anyone else ever saw that side to him. Audrey knew that and recognized how special it was every time it happened.

  “I always notice when you’re gone,” he reassured her.

  She shook her head. “Oh please, Samson. Don’t try pretty words on me. Edward, then?”

  Jude sighed. “And you always see through me, don’t you? Yes, Edward asked me to come and check. But I did notice your absence, Audrey. I am not a liar.”

  “No, you are not that,” she said softly.

  They sat in silence for a moment, though Audrey wouldn’t have necessarily said it was their normal, companionable type. Jude’s smile was gone and there was something troubled in his eyes. Beautiful eyes the color of sapphires.

  Damn, she really shouldn’t wax poetic. Even in her mind. Jude was too bright not to notice and once he did everything would be ruined. It was bound to be, for he didn’t care for her, not like that. Why would he? The man could have any woman he wanted. And if rumor was correct, he had.

  The cloudy expression cleared before he spoke again. “Shouldn’t you be inside celebrating Edward’s marriage?”

  Audrey shrugged.

  Jude leaned away to examine her face. “Don’t you like Mary?”

  Now she jolted at his misunderstanding. Jude had been gone during Edward and Mary’s odd courtship, so he still seemed to be uncertain of the new marchioness. Audrey didn’t want to add to that hesitation.

  “I do like Mary, very much,” she reassured him. “You will too, Samson, I know you will, once you get to know her better. She’s really perfect for Edward.”

  He seemed unmoved by her declaration. He arched a brow. “But?”

  She sighed. “But…but it is odd to welcome a new sister to our fold when Claire is still gone. It feels wrong to all be gathered, except it isn’t all of us. I look for her in the crowd, wishing I could talk to her about so many things, but she’s just not there. And so I’m happy, but also, I’m…”

  Samson nodded, looking away from her and down to the ground a floor below them. “I understand,” he said softly. “Or at least I know what you’re talking about. I doubt I could understand how much you miss your sister.”

  Audrey shook her head. Claire had run away to be married to a most unfortunate man more than a year before. Now she had all but vanished, taking her inheritance with her for the bastard to gobble up as he did God knew what to her.

  But then, that sort of thing felt like it was the price of such passion. Audrey had seen it too many times in her family.

  She set her half-empty plate aside and leaned back against her palms. From the corner of her eye, she watched Jude. He looked guilty. But how could he be? He had searched long and hard for Claire—everyone knew how devoted he’d been to finding her.

  “It isn’t your fault, you know,” she reassured him. “The only person she writes to is Gabriel, probably because they’re twins. They’ve always had that odd connection. She never gives him an address so any of us could return the favor. Even the marks that indicate where the letters were posted change every time a new missive arrives. She wants to stay gone.”

  Jude didn’t look up. “It is still my job to bring her home.”

  “No, you’re Edward’s man of affairs, not his magician.” She stood up and dusted off her gown. He joined her slowly, offering her a hand as she picked up her slippers.

  “Here, balance on me,” he said.

  She smiled. “You do think of everything.”

  She rested one hand in his, ignoring the jolt of awareness that always came from that too-seldom action, and used her other hand to pull her slipper back on. She repeated the action on the opposite foot and then released him.

  “Ready to go back?” she asked, falsely bright. Nothing had been resolved, just as it never was. And although she could have stayed out here all afternoon, far into the night, with Jude, that just wasn’t possible.

  He nodded and motioned to the ladder. “You first?”

  She swung over and climbed down carefully, then steppe
d aside to watch him do the same. It was quite the sight, really, observing Jude Samson’s toned backside come down the ladder, seeing his broad shoulders strain as he moved.

  She blinked and turned her face, forcing herself to stop. There was nothing good to come of desire. She knew that.

  All she could do was try to squash the feelings that roared up whenever she was close to this man.

  Jude tapped his finger along the edge of his glass, watching across the room as Audrey smiled and laughed with her friends. None of them would notice it, of course, none of them would see, but he felt every lie of her performance. She was not happy.

  “Is she all right?”

  He turned to find his friend and employer, the Marquis of Woodley, had come to his side. The marquis also happened to be Audrey eldest brother. And if Edward ever knew the kinds of thoughts Jude had about her…

  “Yes,” he said, interrupting the troubling path of his mind.

  “Are you certain?” Edward pressed.

  Jude hesitated. He should probably tell his friend about his suspicions regarding Audrey. That he thought she was unhappy, that he thought a great deal was troubling her. But to do so was to violate his friendship with her. A friendship quite separate from the one he shared with Edward. Besides, it wasn’t as if Audrey would do anything rash. She wasn’t like Claire—Audrey seemed to shy away from passion entirely.

  Sometimes that fact made Jude far too happy. If he ever saw her with a man she truly liked, well it would be difficult to say the least.

  “Samson?” Edward said, arching a brow at Jude’s silence.

  “I think she simply needed air,” he lied. “How about you?”

  He watched as Edward’s gaze slid across the room to his new bride, Mary. Samson observed the young woman carefully. She was lovely, no one could deny that. And she seemed sincere as she smiled and chatted with the other guests.

  Of course, so had Edward’s first wife. And Alice had blown his friend’s world apart with her cruelty. Still, Jude had always…almost always…been a good judge of character. Mary gave him a good feeling.

  Edward smiled broadly. “I could not be better, Samson, I tell you. You hesitate because of the swiftness of my marriage, and I appreciate your concern after what I went through with Alice. But Mary is my perfect companion, I assure you.”

  “I hope so,” Jude said, unwilling to commit to anything else until he had watched the young woman for a while longer.

  “You know, you should get married,” Edward said, his tone suddenly far away.

  Jude tensed, but he also smiled, amused by his friend’s happy fog. “Should I? And you are the expert, I suppose. Having been married all of two hours.”

  Edward shrugged.

  “Anyway, I’m too busy managing your family to marry.”

  “And your own,” Edward offered, finally forcing himself to look away from the new marchioness.

  Jude blinked, uncertain as to what Edward referred. “I—what?”

  “You were out doing something for your mother during the last month, weren’t you?” Edward asked.

  Jude shifted. That was the story he had told as an explanation for the time he’d taken away from the Woodley clan. And it was partially true, for a visit to his mother had been part of the first week of his time away. But Edward didn’t know the rest. He never could.

  “Oh. Yes,” he said, being careful not to meet his friend’s eyes.

  “How is your mother?” Edward asked.

  Jude shrugged. “She is as well as can be expected. Her hands trouble her a great deal and I think she is a little lonely.” He frowned. “But all in all, she is in good spirits.”

  “Have you thought of bringing her to London? I know a doctor who might be able to help her arthritis.”

  “She has such sad memories of this place from when my father died and we were shunned by his family.” He sighed. “She doesn’t want to return.”

  Edward’s gaze was filled with the same concern Jude felt himself. “You know I understand about family troubles,” he said. “God knows, you’ve seen me through enough of my own between Alice and the estrangement with my siblings. Is there anything I can do to help?”

  Jude stared at him. Edward and his brothers Evan and Gabriel were truly the best friends he had ever had. And a few years ago, he might have confided in Edward. Except his secret had so much to do with the Woodley family. So much to do with betrayal and regret.

  He shook his head. “No. I know my place now, Edward. And it isn’t to drag you into my every difficulty.”

  Edward wrinkled his brow. “But—”

  Jude cleared his throat and motioned across the room. “I believe your lovely wife is giving you a side glance.”

  Just as he had hoped would happen, Edward jerked his attention away from its focus on Jude and his troubles and across the room to where his wife stood. And Jude had not been lying. Mary did cast her eyes toward her husband from time to time, the intent in her dark gaze crystal clear.

  “Indeed, she is,” Edward said as he clapped Jude on the shoulder with a grin. “And I’m off to play husband.”

  “Enjoy,” Jude called after him.

  As soon as his friend was gone, he almost buckled. Around him, the crowd felt loud and too close, and he staggered from the ballroom and out onto the terrace. In the distance the sun was setting and the cooler air hit his face like a welcome slap.

  For years he had born a secret. And with each passing day, it weighed more heavily on him. All he could hope was that no one in the Woodley clan ever uncovered the truth. If they did, he could lose everything.

  Including Audrey. And that would be the biggest loss of all, despite the fact that he held no claim on her and never would.

  CHAPTER TWO

  Audrey stood in the west parlor with her mother, forcing a smile onto her face. It had been three days since her brother’s wedding and they were expecting the new bride and groom for luncheon that day. It wasn’t that she didn’t look forward to the afternoon, but her sense of discomfort continued.

  Lady Woodley arched a brow and Audrey realized in that moment that the dowager had asked her a question. One she had no idea the content of and could not have answered to save her life.

  “I’m sorry, Mama,” she said, dodging her mother’s pointed gaze. There was no one better at a pointed gaze than Lady Woodley, after all. “I admit I was not listening.”

  “I’m well aware,” the dowager said with a frown.

  “It is abominable,” Audrey continued, reaching out to take her mother’s hand. “I will do better. Please ask me again.”

  Her mother shook her head. “I’m not angry, my dear. I’m only concerned.”

  Audrey tensed. She hated to hear that word from her mother’s lips. Lady Woodley had said the same word about Claire not two years before. Concerned. And now Claire was gone. She could see from her mother’s face that she feared Audrey might be on the verge of a similar collapse.

  “You needn’t be worried about me,” Audrey tried to reassure her as genuinely as she could. After all, she had no intention of running away from her family and her duties. Not that the thought hadn’t sometimes crossed her mind. But she’d seen the cost. It was not worth it.

  “You are restless,” Lady Woodley countered sharply. “I would be blind not to see it. It has gone on all Season, but only grown more obvious since Edward’s engagement and marriage. Or do you intend to deny what I can see with my own eyes?”

  Audrey pressed her lips together for a moment. She could lie and put off this conversation, but it would only cause more tension for them both.

  “No,” she admitted after what seemed like an eternity of consideration. “I cannot deny what you say is true.”

  When it was clear Audrey wasn’t going to lie to her, her mother squeezed her daughter’s hand lightly. “Tell me what troubles you. Do you not enjoy the Season?”

  Audrey dipped her head. “No, not much.”

  “Why?”

&nbs
p; Audrey pulled away from her mother’s hand and paced away across the room. She fiddled with the little clock on the mantel for a moment before she answered, “It has all gotten so much more complicated for me, Mama. I’m twenty-four years old, so I am no longer a Diamond. I am bordering on spinsterhood.”

  Her mother laughed. “It is not so bad as that. You have much to recommend you and I’m certain there are at least three men who would marry you today if you made any sign of interest.”

  Audrey rolled her eyes. “Of course there are, but I have no interest in them. Any of them. And beyond my own failings, things have not been the same since…since…”

  She couldn’t complete the sentence and Lady Woodley flinched as understanding dawned on her gently lined face. “Since Claire left.”

  Audrey nodded, relieved she didn’t have to say the words out loud, though she hated that her mother was still hurt by them. “I’m afraid so, yes. People do look at me differently thanks to the scandal she created, and it isn’t exactly comfortable. But it’s more than that. I am also changed by losing her. The way she left was…horrible.”

  “How could you not be? She is your sister, your friend. She was your ideal.”

  Audrey tried to push away the anger that flared at Claire. She knew her sister wasn’t in a good situation, wherever she was. She had been punished enough for her folly, of that Audrey was certain.

  “And then there is all this whirlwind with Edward over the past month,” she continued.

  Her mother’s face softened. “It has worked out well, but I can see how his very sudden and awkward engagement and marriage would affect you. It has taken the dynamic of our family and turned it on its head.”

  Audrey sighed in relief that her mother understood. “Yes, exactly. And all these things put together make me rather, I don’t know—uncomfortable I suppose is the best way to put it. In Society, in the marriage mart, and in my own skin. I just…I don’t know how to explain it.”